Monday, October 06, 2008

Open Letter of Shame

This is an Open Letter to Shame the final 3 people who have not RSVPed. The Deadline was October 1st, as the response card clearly stated. We waited until after the mail on October 4th(in which there were only 2 rsvp cards) before we (really just F) started calling people.


To my friend B:
Girl what is up? I realize you live in a different state now, and I haven’t visited in awhile, but I hear you were in town and didn’t tell anybody on a few occasions. I am one of the last in our group to get married and I thought you’d be all excited to see me get hitched. So I sent you an e-mail, to all 3 of your e-mail addresses to see why you’d not RSVPed. As an after thought, I CC’d your husband. He responded in like 10mins. That was 4 hours ago. I still have not heard from YOU PERSONALLY.
But I’m glad to know that at least your husband will be attending the wedding.


To My Co-Worker A,

Um, I know we aren’t exactly buddy-buddy, but we have worked together 10+ years. About 8 of those with a mere 3.5 inches of cube wall separating us. I also sent you an e-mail 4 hours ago. I have heard nothing. Nothing from the Office Jumper. You know the one person who JUMPS into everyone’s conversation, uninvited? So what? Should I have not invited you, then you would have attended? You think I haven’t noticed you trying to pretend you don’t see me in the hall today? I can hear you clear your throat for fuck’s sake! Just send me an e-mail, one way or the other! What is your issue????



To My Big Boss,
HI! I know we don’t talk much. I rarely come into your office. But I do say HI to you when I see you. You know my name. There are after all only 40 people in our office. I sent you an e-mail this morning too. Granted you are famous for not answering e-mails, how you can do that as a Boss I have yet to figure out, but anyway, this is kinda important. Yes, I realize I used a company resource for a personal purpose, but you kinda brought it on yourself. I’m not asking for a present, I just want to know if we need to set a place for you. I mean, you know how much you pay me, so you know I can’t afford to feed invisible/extra people. I promise, my e-mail was in no way asking for a raise.(although it would be nice)
Please respond.

2 comments:

April said...

People suck. But you know who I hated even worse than the no-rsvpers? The people who did rsvp and then didn't show. Yeah I understand that stuff happens and emergencies arise and blah blah blah. But in that case it is appropriate to apologize for not showing up. Right? Because I just shelled out x number of dollars for the meal you didn't eat, the napkins you didn't use, the little bottle of bubbles that went unopened, the champagne you didn't drink, etc. And no, they don't let you keep the extra food. Yeah, those people piss me off.

DevilsHeaven said...

Yes, You hit the nail on the head April! Would you like to come? I know you would respond! :-)