This is an Open Letter to Shame the final 3 people who have not RSVPed. The Deadline was October 1st, as the response card clearly stated. We waited until after the mail on October 4th(in which there were only 2 rsvp cards) before we (really just F) started calling people.
To my friend B:
Girl what is up? I realize you live in a different state now, and I haven’t visited in awhile, but I hear you were in town and didn’t tell anybody on a few occasions. I am one of the last in our group to get married and I thought you’d be all excited to see me get hitched. So I sent you an e-mail, to all 3 of your e-mail addresses to see why you’d not RSVPed. As an after thought, I CC’d your husband. He responded in like 10mins. That was 4 hours ago. I still have not heard from YOU PERSONALLY.
But I’m glad to know that at least your husband will be attending the wedding.
To My Co-Worker A,
Um, I know we aren’t exactly buddy-buddy, but we have worked together 10+ years. About 8 of those with a mere 3.5 inches of cube wall separating us. I also sent you an e-mail 4 hours ago. I have heard nothing. Nothing from the Office Jumper. You know the one person who JUMPS into everyone’s conversation, uninvited? So what? Should I have not invited you, then you would have attended? You think I haven’t noticed you trying to pretend you don’t see me in the hall today? I can hear you clear your throat for fuck’s sake! Just send me an e-mail, one way or the other! What is your issue????
To My Big Boss,
HI! I know we don’t talk much. I rarely come into your office. But I do say HI to you when I see you. You know my name. There are after all only 40 people in our office. I sent you an e-mail this morning too. Granted you are famous for not answering e-mails, how you can do that as a Boss I have yet to figure out, but anyway, this is kinda important. Yes, I realize I used a company resource for a personal purpose, but you kinda brought it on yourself. I’m not asking for a present, I just want to know if we need to set a place for you. I mean, you know how much you pay me, so you know I can’t afford to feed invisible/extra people. I promise, my e-mail was in no way asking for a raise.(although it would be nice)