Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Things that Gross Me Out

1) Meat. In a CAN.

This has grossed me out since elementary school when a girl brought those little hot dog things in a can. The smell made me gag. Seeing them packed in water made me want to hurl.

F went out and bought diced chicken in a can from Costco because one of his co-workers told him it was good. That was about a month ago and none of the cans have been opened.

I’m dreading the day he tries to make me eat it.


2) The Seafood aisle in the grocery story.

I hold my breath every time we have to walk by it. I desperately try to avoid it at all costs.


3) Fish/Seafood. Period.

Please do not try and convince me that I don’t know what I’m missing. I’m not missing anything, and I’m glad of it. I will never miss that fishy taste that I can taste no matter what “cut” of fish I’m asked to try. Keep your fish, crab legs, oysters and seafood “Variety Buckets”. F had a seafood variety bucket when we went to Hilton Head Island. The smell alone made me want to move to another table, but watching him devour it, DEVOUR IT WITH GLEE, made me wish that I was in a whole other restaurant.

I made him wash his face and hands SEVERAL times that night before he was allowed in bed. I could smell it in his goatee!!!!

Especially keep your tuna fish. Holy hell the smell that shit leaves behind!


4) Any of those Discovery Planet type shows that show animals eating each other. F was watching one about lions a few weekends ago. I had all I could do to keep from hurling as they showed the lions eviscerating the gazelles. Their blood covered muzzles really got to me. Oh, my stomach is turning just thinking about it.


5) Pickled animal body parts.

I have no desire to see pickled pigs’ feet when I’m trying to pick out a lovely steak. F thinks he can convince me that eating chickens’ feet is like eating chips. Crispy and tasty.

When I was in college during Spring Break I went on what they called Alternative Spring Break. A group of us would go somewhere in the country and help out. Build houses, clean and paint the community center or work in the Soup Kitchen. Many restaurants and bakeries and what-not would donate day old food to the soup kitchen. Imagine my horror when I took the lid off the pan and a greasy layer of green goo greeted me. Then I stirred it to discover what meat product was contained within. “WHAT IS THAT???” my Midwestern, strictly meat and potatoes brain could not place the long boney item.

“OX tail.” The swarthy soup kitchen cook informed me.



(If you eat these food items, please take no offense. To each his own.)

6) Cleaning up bodily, um, waste. Needless to say the bathroom is my LEAST favorite room to clean and getting F to clean is like, well, virtually IMPOSSIBLE unless I raise my voice and threaten harm. So yes, I know when we have kids I am screwed, but I’ll handle it. I think.


What stimulates your gag reflex????

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