Tuesday, February 17, 2009

I'm Sorry, I Can't

"I'm Sorry, I Can't eat anything."
I said this a lot while we were in The Homeland.
"Just PLAIN white rice please."
I said that a lot too.
The Homeland food and I did not get along too very well.
We wanted to like each, really we did, but somewhere along the line, we had a major disagreement and never recovered from it.
Food would be brought out and my stomach would turn. Food would be forced down my throat and my stomach would convulse.
In the beginning F and I ate happily. About 3 days in though, we were both not feeling well. I think it all linked back to Christmas Eve night when F's cousin got me trashed without me realizing it until I attempted the stairs in my fancy Christmas heels. When F's Cousin asked me what I liked to drink, I said, Vanilla Vodka, which he brought to me straight, not even on the rocks.
"Um, with Coke please?"
"Coke? You want me to MIX it TOGETHER?????!!!!!"
"Yes please. Lord, if I drank it straight!!!!!!!!!"
Well, I might as well have been drinking it straight, a splash of Coke at best was added. The next morning, Christmas Day, F and I were to meet up with Cousin and begin our tour.
"F, I don't think I can make it. I feel horrid."
"It's because you drank so much last night, DH."
"What? I only had 3 glasses."
"Uh, Nooooo, more like 6."
"Oh yeah, and Cousin wasn't mixing them light either."
"Oh, ugh."
Needless to say, F and I spent Christmas day in bed, with the shades drawn. I could finally stand around 6 pm when we were summoned for dinner. Drinking and Jet Lag do not mix well, FYI.
It was pretty much down hill after that. Thankfully F's Other Cousin is a pharmacist and got us all kinds of good meds. At first, they worked fine. So I think we got cocky and quite taking them. BIG MISTAKE.
The last week we were there? I was sick as a dog. My intestines convulsed to the point I was doubled over in pain. Anything I ate, came racing back out. I was nauseated the whole time. F wanted to take me to the hospital, I refused.
Other Cousin was consulted once again and he had more drugs sent over. (a plus about the homeland, EVERYTHING delivers, even McDonald's!)

24 Hours a day!

The drugs helped, but I could tell the SECOND they began to wear off because my intestines would start twitching.

The flights home were a nightmare. A flight attendant took one look at me and asked me if I was OK. Luckily I had enough drugs in me and was so exhausted from being sick, that I slept most of the way home. It took me 3 weeks to finally be able to eat normally again, without pain and nausea.

I can only imagine what the Extended Family thought of me. I hope they understood. I wasn't being rude or picky, just sickie.

Then about 2 weeks after we got home, we get a letter from Costco telling us that the power bars we bought to take with us, potentially had some of that tainted peanut butter in them.

We ate those daily.



April said...

Wait, what?? Vanilla vodka mixed with diet coke??? Why am I unaware of this miraculous concoction??? Note to self: Stop at Bevmo and find Vanilla Vodka. Also, flask.

DevilsHeaven said...

April! Seriously, they also make CHERRY vodka. Sister girl, where have you been?!?!?!?!