Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Now Boarding, Hell in a Hand Basket, Gate 666

I'm getting married! Yes, in case you haven't caught on to that yet, that is the news. Now, being a good guilt ridden Catholic, I'm getting married in the Church. Luckily, I shopped the local pews and kneelers, and found a church with a very cool priest who is funny and educational, go figure.

The Date was set almost immediately and then I was informed that 6 months worth of "counseling" would need to take place before the "I Dos". SIX MONTHS?? Are you kidding me?

They were not kidding, and it's really not all "counseling" either.

F and I went for our first meeting, and Father, true to form, was funny, and educating, and not at all damning when F and I gave the same address. He thanked us for being honest. Then he told us a funny story about another couple who lied and then were so eaten by guilt that they showed up, in tears, and confessed. He gave them the challenge of not having sex until the wedding, 10 months out. Saying that it would strengthen their union because they would find out if their relationship was too heavily based upon sex.

He presented us with the same challenge. Asking, "What will make that day truly special then? What will have really changed once you go home?"

I snickered.

F paled.

I knew F would have a hard time not "doing it", but I feel I am quite capable of abstaining. We discussed it when we got home.

And had completely different ideas about what Father meant. F feels that it just means no sex, that we can continue to sleep in the same bed.

I however, feel that he means we sleep completely separately. Which, honestly? I feel I'd sleep so much better! All these years of sleeping alone are hard to shake.

F thinks I would crack. About the sex, not the sleeping in different rooms. And I think I would crack about the sleeping in a different room, not the sex.

F? He'll just crack.

That is as far the conversation got.

Our next meeting with Father is at the end of next month. When we take the PMI-PerMarital Inventory. I'm a little freaked that F and I will have too many "red flags" and Father will tell us not to get married. I mean I am seriously freaked out about it.

Like, I can't sleep freaked out about it. Which probably means either I'm over reacting, or there is reason for me to be freaked out.

Are there things F and I haven't covered? Probably. Do I know what those are? Besides the religion our kids will be? Not so much.

So, 30 days of worry and sleeplessness. Yay me.

1 comment:

Becky said...

My fiance and I just took that test (our diocese uses the Prepare test). I haven't filled out a scantron sheet since college, so that was interesting. Most of the questions aren't too bad - they ask a lot about how you handle finances, and about families. I'm sure you guys will do fine! Plus, if you have lots of things to talk about, isn't that better than sitting in silence?

Oh, and because it freaked me out to answer it in a church (we live together too), I'll warn you - there are a couple (although not many) questions about sex. Whether it was talked about freely around your house growing up, etc.