Because I’m a Self Declared Expert

Lately, little to no food has sounded good to me. Yes, I’ll eat. But outside of my morning granola, I can barely be tempted to heft fork to mouth. Except when it comes to Mexican fare. For whatever reason I have been on a Mexican kick for like 2 months. I cannot be satisfied. Everything I attempt to eat that is Mexican doesn’t measure up to whatever yard stick I’ve got floating around in my head. Within the last 2 weeks I have eaten at 4 different “fast food” Mexican places. Let us start with the worst and work our way up, shall we? Because as the title infers, I’ve decided I am now an Expert.



***Composer’s Note***


From here within are purely my opinions.There is no science behind it. If you do not agree with me, that is fine. We are all entitled to our own opinions.


All meals were of the same notion, Burrito, which included, a variant of “Mexican rice”, some form of Steak, pinto beans, salsa, shredded cheese, topped off with sour cream, and a side of nacho chips. Easy enough, right?



From the Category of “I can’t believe I choked it all down”: Rio Wraps! Their RIOriginal Burrito? Oh sweet lord. The “Steak” was, Watery. The rice was tasteless; the sour cream was almost nonexistent. And the steak was watery. Did I mention the steak was watery? The greasy water ran down my hand as I bite into it. Even their chips were kinda gross. I don’t mind whole grain, but these whole grain chips were the whole grain of our parents’ youth, Cardboard. The best part of the whole meal? The lemonade.



Salsarita’s Fresh Cantina. Is our next stop on dusty road of Mexican Fast Food. F is always telling me I use too much salt, and when I cook, he says my food is TOO SALTY!! I of course don’t believe him, and tell him HIS food is TOO PEPPERY!!! Anyway, my point is, Salarita’s Steak Burrito was TOO SALTY. As in I COULD NOT FINISH IT. The meat was ok, other than the saltiness. Not the highest quality steak, that’s for sure. I don’t remember what the rice tasted like, but the salsa was good. Very spicy for the “Medium” I ordered, but still good. Their pre-sweetened tea made my teeth hurt from the sugar content. Thank goodness they had unsweetened tea to tune it down with. It was a forgettable burrito. The chips however were DEVINE. I imagine they would have been even better if I’d gotten the queso dip I ordered instead of the salsa, oh well.



Taco Bell. Some say it is not real Mexican food. I kind of agree, but in a fix it will do. I’ve gotten the Grilled Steak Burrito and the Grilled Suft Steak Burrito. Both are actually quite good. Both would benefit from more sour cream, but that might be just me. They are filling, and the steak is pretty good. The nacho cheese for the chips is kind of addicting in a cheap cheese like food product way. I’m actually kind of craving this now dang it. Luckily we have a Taco Bell right by our house.

Here’s a question for my digital friends across the pond, Why do you dislike Taco Bell? My friend A, who is a transplant in the U.K., begged her friends via Facebook to send her some Taco Bell seasoning because Mexican food is a no go over there. What gives?????



And our final resting place on the road of Mexican Fast Food stops is, QDOBA. Oh, be still my growling tummy. The amount of you food you receive is gut busting. Their Queso Cheese Burrito? HEAVEN. The salsa is good, the meat is fresh. The chips are just salty enough. The rice has a good flavor. ITS GOOD people, REALLY GOOD. My one complaint is when they are building said fabu-ness is that all the sauces end up on one side of the burrito. So when you take a bite on the left side you get an explosion of salsa, sour cream, and queso sauce, but when you bite on the right you get meat, rice and beans. It is sadly lopsided. I have actually asked them to place it down the middle or even on BOTH sides. That aside, Qdoba is my top choice for good Fast Food Mexican. I am still currently looking for a good Slow food Mexican restaurant. Alas, I have yet to find it.



And just for the sake of argument, I have tried Chipotle. It does not measure up to Qdoba. It just does not. The flavors are not as strong, even if they do give you more nachos.

Novel Idea!

This really made me laugh..........................

                                       Also, love these shoes!

A Realization I'd Rather Not Have Had

Remember this wedding F and I went to back in August? I thought I told you about the woman who showed up towards the end, but now I see I did not. I must have thought better of it at the time. The wedding was going all fine and well, we were all having a great time, when the origin of the word "Frenemy" walked in. Our table fell silent. Now this woman, I had not seen or heard from her in almost 20years. I was completely shocked to see her. And then I was completely upset. After almost 20 years the old rage and anger and hurt came exploding to the surface. I had no idea anyone was still in contact with her. Frenemy was the queen of the cut down, friend or foe; no one escaped her cutting words. She could deliver a backhanded compliment that would only dawn on you days later, that, HEY! That was MEAN! She always thought she was better than the rest of us, even though my circle took her in when the "in crowd" tossed her out. Out of all the girls in our circle of friends, I seemed to be the main focus of her attention when it came to slights and belittling. More often than not I held my own against her. But it stung. It hurt. And when we all scattered to different colleges, I was not at all heartbroken to be rid of her. Every now and again when I would go home for a visit I would hear what she was up to. Kicked off the college volley ball team. Dropped out of school. Drugs, she told me herself at a wedding one year. Then the reports stopped coming. I didn't really care. I felt that I had finally moved on. Then I heard she gotten married. And had the mother of our mutual friend,  R, do the flowers for her wedding. Not once did she try to contact R when she was in town dealing with R's mom. It appeared to me, that she'd had no problem cutting ties with her old h.s. acquaintances.


The Bride from the wedding in August sent out an e-mail announcing she was expecting. So I waited for the invite to her baby shower. It never came. So I put out feelers to those I knew keep in better contact with her than I do. In the end we decided to throw her a little shower of our own. A few ladies from way back were invited, no prob, it would be nice to see them after all these years. But then the Face Book message arrived from R: "A sent me text telling me she invited Frenemy and wants to honor her as well since she just had a baby."

Well ok. That little message sent my anxiety sky rocketing. I do not want to buy her a present. I had no idea she was even pregnant. My anger rolled over me. I shot off an e-mail to a friend who had recently come to me with a similar situation. I was disgusted with myself for still allowing Frenemy to affect me. To still be able to get under my skin after almost 20 freaking years. I tried to search myself for the forgiveness that I see in so many others. And that is when it hit me. My anger, my hurt, came not just from what Frenemy had put me through all those years ago, but from the lack of support from the other girls.

No one ever told her to stop. No one ever stood beside me in my defense. No one else, to this day, will admit what a bitch she was. A's husband actually told F at the wedding that "she's just a poor misunderstood little rich girl." Maybe. Maybe not. But it is with this realization that I am still hurt by my friends’ lack of support, that I feel calm. That I feel I can handle seeing her again, and being forced to interact with her.

It also comes with sadness. Sadness at the realization that my friends maybe weren't, and possibly aren't the good friends I thought they were/are. I am a ferociously loyal person. Every personality test and horoscope will tell you the same thing. I expect the loyalty I give to be returned, in full. And now I finally have to admit, that my childhood friends possibly aren't that loyal. Something F has been telling me from day one.

This saddens me to no end. And I am not sure how to move forward from here. I do not want to cut ties altogether, after all, R and I have been friends since 3rd grade. That is a lot of history to walk away from. But at the same time, walking away may be the only way to let the healing begin.

What to do my digital friends? Have any of you found yourself in this spot???

My New Love

I always thought that Nachos piled with cheese, drowning in sour cream was the best PMS crave food I could get. With maybe a side of cheese bread. Salty, sweet, and greasy, YUM. I never really felt satisfied though. All the heart clogging goodness could never really satisfy that deep down primal hunger.


Last night though, my PMS induced yearning was satisfied in a manner which I never thought possible. The longing was INSTANTIOUSLY quelled when The Outback Steakhouse server brought me their Aussie Cheese Fries.  SWEET HEAVEN on a plate!!!

 Aussie Cheese Fries

Aussie Fries topped with melted Monterey Jack, Cheddar,

bits of fresh chopped bacon and served with a spicy

ranch dressing. Regular 7.95 Small 5.95

That spicy ranch dressing? OMG. I can't even explain. I almost licked the dipping bowl clean. I never thought my PMS cravings would ever truly be met. But I am telling you my digital sisters, RUN out and get yourself an order. I think I even moaned when I took my first bite. They were the prefect portions of salty, sweet, gooey and greasy.

F and I got the small order, which was a good thing because lord knows we made quick work of those fries.

Yes, my new go to stress food, my new down under love, AUSSIE CHEESE FRIES.

Is it wrong to love a food in this manner?????

If it is, I don't want to be right!!!

Why Its on Sale

You know when it looks bad even on the model, it is a BAD IDEA.

Every slighty over weight girl should take one look at those sleeves and feel the need to fire up the Bic.

Seriously. BAD. IDEA.

The look on her face says: "HAHA, you're kidding me right? You aren't serious about this being a top you're trying to market to girls with hefty arms. For $60 bucks. Right?? Right??????? No marketing it down to $50 does not make it any better."