Wednesday, April 02, 2008

More of Yesterday and into Last Night

My mother called me while I was still at work last night. We spoke for a few minutes and like a true mother she says, "What's wrong? Is everything ok? Are YOU ok?"

ME: "I've been better." I sighed as I could feel the tears welling in my eyes.

Mom: "What's happened?"

So as the tears begin to run down my face, I relay the tale.

Mom: "Oh DH. Do you think you can spend the rest of your life living with them?"

ME: "I don't know mom, I really don't know."

And then I really started crying, and my nose started running. (why does that always happen at the same time? like crying isn't enough, your body's gotta throw in a few snot bubbles to top it off?)

Then, I got a bloody nose. Really helpful, let me tell ya.

So we talked for awhile. She told me I had to work it out with F as to how we'd handle these types of things. She's very comforting, that mom of mine.

When I got home F was waiting for me to take me out to dinner, and the water works started again. (trust me, I find myself annoying right now with all this damned crying.) Any woman knows that talking while sobbing does not make for an easy conversation. F listened, we talked very calmly. I told him I couldn't come to love a man(FIL) who is so cruel for no reason. And that I always feel like I can't be myself when we are at his parents', that I'm always uncomfortable. He told me that he told his mother that's why we don't stay there when we come to visit.

ME: "But that's the thing F, you tell her, not him. And you know as well as I do, she's not telling him this stuff. Of course he probably wouldn't care if she did."

He told me if I was going to leave him he wasn't going to help me move my stuff out. A running joke between us which made me laugh.

In the end I asked him to please defend my honor.

F: "I do."

ME: "Well ok, then defend my honor the way I would." I grinned at him full well knowing I was asking more than he could deliver as far as telling his father off is concerned.

I think everything is ok now.

Of course I screwed myself out of a nice dinner with all my blubbering, damn it.

Stupid girl hormones.


Kathy said...

Snot bubbles really do suck, Adult, especially when combined with already flowing tears! I'm new to your blog -- have spent the last 24 hours reading back through 2006 to present, and have enjoyed the misery of your journey. (Is that wrong?) Anywho, you've got your work cut out for you to handle your FIL for the rest of his life. But it sounds like the love you and F share is strong enough to see you through the struggles and frustrations. I hate that you missed your nice dinner out, though! And I think it's hilarious that F doesn't know about this blog. Is that still the case? Priceless! I'm looking forward to following your journey to the altar!

DevilsHeaven said...

HA! Misery loves company!
F still doesn't know about it. I'm certain he would not be pleased with me sharing this stuff. So SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!