Like Sands Through the Hour Glass....

The last few days were spent with Crazy Best friend in Cheese Head Country. I ate a horrifying amount of cheese and discovered a beer named after a small rodent like creature. I also realized I'm just not able to recover as quickly from drinking as I used to be. However, all was good until she started analysis my relationship with BF. "You have to break down the walls Adult. You have to let him in....blah blah blah." And as she was shuffling me off to the plane back home the next day,

"Remember Adult let down your walls where BF is concerned. Don't EVER CHANGE!"

Um, can we say Oxymoron? I realize the "Don't Ever Change" was meant along the same lines as "BFF" and "Stay Cool 4 Ever" yearbook type sayings, but, Seriously?

Upon my arrival home BF tells me he confronted his Rents about their lack of initiative when it comes to their visiting their out of state son.

"I talked to my Rents about coming out here. I dropped the F-Bomb on my mom I was so mad."

"Oh, ouch, how'd it go?"

"They're coming. I told them what you said about not going to visit them again until they come out here."

OMG! OMFG!!!!!!! HE DID WHAT!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!? I could feel the Rent hate vibing towards me across the thousands of miles. Mind you I imparted this bit of girlfriend advance after the visit out to see them and was dragged kicking and screaming to see countless, faceless, relatives to which I had barely 20 words to speak. They quite literally speak a different language, and I'm not talking one that would be covered by High School Spanish either. Upon listening to one of his many rants about the Rents and their non-visiting status I laid down the threat of all threats, We don't visit until they do. This threat of course was never to be linked to me. I was to be Kevin Spacey in The Usual Suspects, just limpin along to the music, smiling like the good girlfriend completely in the dark about how or why they finally decided to visit. Instead, he makes me Stephen Baldwin, and you know Stephen NEVER gets out alive.

"You did what???? You told who WHAT?!?!?! Are you crazy??!?!!?! Shit! Now I'm just not the wrong color(culture) I'm mouthy and opinionated to boot!!!!!!! "

My horror at my new label was met with laughter, and then he got out the macaroni and cheese to make for dinner.