I know the saying goes, “Make your our traditions when you get married.” However, I’m finding that hard to do when it appears F has no traditions from which to draw. They don’t appear to have any traditional food when it comes to the holidays. Most people know ham for Easter( I think I was served baked chicken), Turkey for Thanksgiving(which they do, but use some kind of pasta as stuffing instead of bread.) Ham or Turkey for Christmas (I think we had chicken and maybe some sort of beef.). When I ask him what they usually have I get an “I don’t know.” My family was very big on the food aspect of every holiday. Ham for Easter, Turkey and stuffing for Thanksgiving, I think we had Turkey for Christmas as well or maybe even steak. The other night as I was finishing decorating the tree, F was downstairs doing laundry. Really? Laundry instead of Christmas music and colored lights? When I asked him what they did at Christmas time he said his mom did all the decorating and baking, that they really didn’t have any traditional things that they did. In my family? We did everything together for the holidays. Especially at Christmas. Dad would set up the tree, string the lights, very preciously, and then we would all put the ornaments on the tree. When it came time to bake, again, everyone was involved, except maybe dad. And there were certain cookies that got made every year. I love my family traditions. And I would love to add something to them for “our” family such as it is right now. If he has bad memories about the holidays, I wish he’d tell me so I’d stop asking or pushing for things to do. He always seems to back away when I ask about such things. From what he has told me, I don’t think his childhood was very childlike. At least not once they moved to the U.S.
How did/do you handle the combining of traditions with your squeeze?
So this weekend? I am forcing him to help me make Christmas cookies. Something I’ve never done by myself. And next weekend? He is helping make the traditional food item we usually only had at Easter, but now that we are all adults, we make for almost all holidays. A food item from my ethnic background, which I plan to introduce to HIS family.
Pray for me.