Saturday, June 25, 2011

Come With Me, My Digital Friends, On A Short Sale Journey

We listed the house. We hired an attorney. After dropping off my "short sale packet" and laying down the $1,750.00 in retainer fee (this shows up as still pending on the website so now I think maybe we don't have a lawyer?), I get back to my office and read this extremely cheery article about how things are looking up!  NOT. I then topped off that wonderful news with an entire sunny weekend spent inside cleaning said house. Note to future and or current Landlords, DO NOT ALLOW PETS. I don't even want to relive the cleaning of black dog hair for your understanding. I really don't. But just let me say, I almost gagged the one millionth time I got one in my mouth. Behind the stove we found onion peels, dog hair, the dog's ball, and MASSIVE AMOUNTS of GREASE.  Now normally, I can't say that I clean behind my own stove and fridge like EVER, but I certainly will start now.  I don't think in the 3 years Tenant lived there that the curtains were ever washed. Now this is something I do DO. I desperately need to dry clean several sets but F would have a massive coronary at the price. Over the two days I had to keep reminding myself that it could have been oh so much worse, so very very much.  But I think since it was never intended to be an income property, I have different feelings about how it should have been respected. I was LETTING Tenant live in my home, and it should have been respected as such. I know, that is expecting too much. But that is how I felt. I also had to keep reminding myself that I don't wash my walls on a regular basis and therefore I need to stop bitching about how dirty they were. Light colored walls really show the dirt. My mom, the amazing trooper that she is, used Comet on the entry way walls. Yes, Comet. Dirt is not the new black. But now the house is all sparkly clean. And I feel better about it looking nice to sell.  We even had a showing that very weekend, but still have not heard back about. It does make me a tad concerned. How long could this drag on? Our realtor told us that with one house they just closed on, they started back in October, of 2010. Seriously? The bank/mortgage company dragged it's feet for SIX months. That is insane. So here we sit, waiting. Will it sell? And if it DOES sell, will the bank/mortgage company "forgive" the remainder? I owe $107K, the houses in the surrounding area have gone for anywhere between $25K to $40K.  How is that even right? I don't even want to do the math. The short sale will show up on my credit report, for at least 3 years and will lop off a good 120 points, if not more.  If the bank/mortgage company does not "forgive" the difference between what is owed and what the house sold for, I could end up paying taxes on the "income". Even though it never actually will come in to me. It will go directly to the bank. Again, how does that work? I just don't get it. Then to top it all off? Tenant stiffed us with $510 water bill.  Well now, isn't that special? It completely explains why almost a month after moving out Tenant has not contacted us about getting back the security deposit. Half of which will now go towards paying said water bill and the late fees/penalties. SES told me that even though the Lease states if Tenant does not contact us within 4 days to tells us where to send said security deposit they are SOL, I STILL have to make some attempt just in case Tenant decides to get all legal and demand the remainder. Which I don't believe will happen, but I still need to CYA.  Again, how does that work? You stiff me and yet I still need to let you know that you can have your money back?  WTF?
So keep your fingers crossed my digital friends, that the house sells at the highest price possible and that the mortgage company/bank forgives it, and does so in a timely manner so that F and I can move on with our lives. Bad credit and all.
 Or as I like to refer to it, SCREWING ME TWICE over the same house. Because really, it only makes complete sense that after you fuck up the housing market you still get to makes the rules about how to unfuck it up.
Totally logical.

No comments: