In the wee hours of the morning F says to me: "DH? You awake?" as he reaches over and starts rubbing my breast.
Me: "Emph." (i was still half asleep)
F: "DH,You awake? Come over here so I can tell you something funny."
As he continues to rub my breast: "Come on over here so I can tell you something funny!!"
It is at this point where my sleep fogged brain starts to register that he's probably talking in his sleep. It also registers that it is not happy about being awake.
Me: "Are you even FUCKING AWAKE???"
F: "Yeah! Come on, come here so I can tell you something funny." He squeezes my breast.
Me: "F. Go back to SLEEP."
2 seconds later he is giggling in his sleep.
The next morning when I ask him and recount the conversation to him, he tells me I am crazy, that didn't happen. And if it DID then he was acting out his dream and I should have went along with it.
Yes, every girl's dream, to have unmemorable sex.